Antibullying Week 2018

#antibullyingweek

This morning I went to my daughters school for an anti-bullying fundraiser which was hosted by one of our local radio stations Star FM 104.5. The theme for the fundraiser was big bows and crazy socks. It was a great morning with a sausage sizzle, face painting, plaster painting, games and the school choir. I think it is a fantastic thing how schools these days are really making an effort to say no to bullying.

I have been inspired to put together a video for anti bullying week. This is important to me because I was bullied at school and it did have a big impact on my. I do not want my kids to ever be bullied and I do not want them to be the bully either.

This is a snippet of what I have said in the video;

“It is so important to be kind
Because we are all human beings
No one is better or worse
We are just different
And different is what makes the world interesting
Being unique is not a hinderance
It is our strength
Whilst it is normal to not always get along with everyone
It is never ever ok to bully any one
Making people feel uncomfortable and excluding them
Hurting them by kicking, hitting, pushing, tripping, etc.
Name-calling and spreading nasty rumours
None of these things are ok
Whether it is ok or on the internet
Treat others as you want to be treated”

Please watch the whole video to hear the whole story.

International Women’s Day 2018

What is international women’s day all about? Officially it is a celebration of the social, economic, cultural and political achievements of women and a call-to-action to progress gender parity. In my own words it is a celebration of women, a celebration of our achievements, progress, journey and individuality. We are beautifully unique and have something unique to offer this world. Women’s day is about being confident in our own bodies. It is about with out hesitation, being able to do the things that make our hearts sing and be our true authentic selves. So many of us struggle with in ourselves, to and be these things. We are held back and society holds us back. We try to be what we think we should be but are we truly courageous enough to be who really want to be? Are we able to let go of our conditioning about what we think it means to be a woman, the unrealistic ideals and pressures of  the past, the media and even social media.

In many ways we are blessed because we have achieved so much, we have so many rights and freedoms compared to many women in other parts of the world, however we still are not equal.  Women pay more for household items, make 16% less than their male counterparts and are under represented in government. We still shoulder most of the household burden regardless of whether both partners are working or not. Sadly women are more likely to be the victims of stalking, sexual assault, domestic violence and live in poverty. Sexism is still very much alive. From a small child up until now I have experienced sexist comments, derogatory name calling, bulling, stalking, sexual abuse and domestic violence. I am one of the 1 in 3 who has experienced domestic violence and 1 in 4 who has experienced sexual abuse. There are many people out there who have had much more horrific experiences than me but it is still not ok in any form. It was only a couple of days ago, I can’t remember where I read a post by a man and it said:

I said to my “worst scenario with online dating is you have a bad date”
My date replied ‘worst scenario I am raped or killed”
That’s when I finally got it…..

#IWD2018 #Internationalwomensday #PressforProgress

2018, A Fresh New Year!

It’s been a while since I have written and I haven’t done as many blogs lately. Things have been pretty full on recently. I would say this has been both the worst and best year. There has been separation, endings and new beginnings. This year has had many struggles, lessons learnt, re-learned, lots of personal growth and finally finding some self worth. It has had the lowest of lows with anxiety and a the highest of highs with new found energy and sense of self. It is most definitely been a challenging year and I will always remember this year. I will always be thankful for the lessons and letting go of things that no longer serve me, that are no longer good for me. I have always held back so much, but this year was the time I was finally able to be myself, my true authentic self. That is a massive step forward for me. I still have a long way to go but I know I will get there . I’m not usually one for news years resolutions.  I like to have goals all year round but this new year I am going to have some resolutions. I have had a big fall recently and have become stuck in some bad habits. It’s most definitely time to let go of those and move forward, focus on my goals and being the best person I can be. It’s time to rise up again and get on with life. This year I had two tattoos done for the first time. one is a lotus and the other a Phoenix. They are both great symbols of re-birth, rising up and new beginnings. I’m looking forward  to 2018, a fresh new year with many possibilities. Happy New Year everyone! I wish you all happiness, peace, good health, prosperity and lots of laughter.

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Happy Australia Day!

Happy Australia Day!

For me Australia day is all about all Australians celebrating our diversity, achievements and moving forward together in a positive way.

Ever since the beginning of Australia day in 1938, there has always been some Indigenous Australian’s who refer to it as invasion day or survival day because they believe it is a day of mourning instead of a day of celebration. Morning and acknowledging the history of Australia’s Aboriginal and Torres Strait Islander people, including the trauma caused by government policies of assimilation and separation that saw many people removed from their traditional lands and culture. This also includes recognition of the violence of the Frontier Wars, a period of conflict between settlers and Australia’s Indigenous peoples, which lasted from 1788 up until the time around the Coniston massacre in 1928. January 26, marks the anniversary of the arrival of the first fleet and the beginning of all the injustices against Australia’s Indigenous.* Federation day has been proposed as the alternate date. It was on New Years day in 1901 that British Colonies formed to make a federation.

I am not Aboriginal or Torres Strait Islander. So it is easy to say, well this doesn’t affect me. It may not affect me personally and I don’t think we should always make decisions based on a disgruntled minority. In this case, I think it makes sense and is the right thing to do. That’s if a referendum showed it is what the majority of Indigenous Australians want. I mean would any one ever say to the families of world war one veterans to just get over it. No way, no would dare to say that. So why can people easily say ‘get over it’ to our Indigenous? The last of the stolen generation were taken in the early 1970’s. That is not that long ago.

The name Australia day wasn’t adopted until 1935 and it was not until 1994 that the day was consistently marked as a public holidays across all states and territories. So I don’t think it’s any big deal to change it. For me I am personally not fussed whether Australia day is celebrated on the 1st or 26th. There are many other possible dates. What is important to me is that it is a day of celebration for all Australians. That there is no longer this division between Australia day and Invasion day. As I said at the beginning of this post ‘Australia day is all about all Australians celebrating our diversity, achievements and moving forward together in a positive way.

Any way, these are just my thoughts. Every one is entitled to their opinions. I hope you all have a great day. What has every one got planned? We are going over to meet my Mum at my Nana’s. She lives on the bay, so the kids are going to have a swim and afterwards we are planning to have fish n chips for lunch 

*Is an excerpt from https://www.sbs.com.au/nitv/explainer/australia-day-invasion-day-survival-day-whats-name

Goodbye 2016, Hello 2017

This is a pic of me and my two eldest girls at the races today. It was a good day with family and friends. We all got soft serve ice cream from Maccas on the way home and then the kids went in the little pool they got for Christmas. All the kids are in bed except for Shalia who will be going soon and then I will be having a couple of JD’s and watching Netflix. Obviously NYE isn’t what it used to be but JD and Netflix is still good when your a busy Mum of four young kids. It’s finally me time or occasionally time with Steve in peace and quiet while all the kids sleep.

I have been seeing a lot of posts on Facebook about how 2016 has been a bad year and how people can’t wait for it to be over. I do have friends who have suffered loss and hardship and it’s no competition as to had the crappiest year but across the board it seems many are happy to say good bye to 2016 and looking with hope to 2017 to be a better year.

For me I wouldn’t say my year was crappy. Parts were, such as another car crashing into Steve and then the car being written off, but he was ok and that is most important. Loosing my Nana is something that I could say was crappy but I was at peace with that. For me death isn’t final, it’s like moving from one state to another or from one room to another. Nana was a medium, a brilliant medium who was booked out six days a week and read for celebrities for a long time. We used to talk about spiritual things and death. Nana used to say to me ‘we both know when you die, you aren’t really gone.’ Of all the people that have passed over the years, I thought I’d connect with her after she passed but that didn’t happen. She is practically the only person I didn’t connect with, except for her presence that I felt at her memorial. Initially I was surprised but now I know we will connect again at some point and the lack of connection with my Nana is also a part of my journey at the moment.

It may sound found strange, but I think my journey was into my own darkness. To face it, even embrace it. We all have a shadow self but we don’t like to acknowledge it. However what we repress and what we fear has power over us. I could go on and write a major essay about how I faced my shadow and for the first the time I was empowered. That hat is another blog though. What I will say is now I feel more comfortable in who I am and I feel an inner strength I have never had before. I even think I finally feel like a person. It’s hard to describe but a few months ago I had an experience which can be described like light switch being switched on. I went from not feeling not connected and not feeling, to suddenly feeling switched on and connected. From feeling I am not present to being more present.

What next? I don’t know. After so long being too hard on myself and also nearly seven years of either being pregnant or breastfeeding. I just want to enjoy life a bit and yes I have been drinking a bit (not right now, I mean drinking recently, lol) and you know what, I’m ok with that. I return to work 2 days a week in a couple of weeks. Shalia goes into year 1, Phoenix starts day care and will go with Indigo on the days I’m working. It will be the first year I don’t have goals. For the first time I’m just letting myself be where I’m at. There’s a first for everything…..

Happy New Year 2017!

 

Care for the Coast Christmas Drive

Friday night was filled with wrapping a couple of hundred presents, a few drinks and laughs.

Of course I wasn’t wrapping presents on my own. Eight months ago in March I became a volunteer for Care for the Coast. I am the local drop off point in my area.  Care For The Coast is a not for profit organisation based on the NSW Central Coast. It is run by Mums who have come together to help families in our midst experiencing hardship and crisis. Some families are on verge of becoming homeless, some have sick children or a sick parent and others are fleeing domestic violence. Care for the Coast Helps through the collection and distribution of food, toiletries and pre-loved items such as clothing, toys for kids, things for babies, homewares. Care for the Coast also refers people to other local services or groups.

I did not know what to expect when I first became I volunteer. All I knew was I wanted to help people and make a difference. With four young children it is hard to find something I can actually do. So being a Care for the Coast volunteer was perfect. My front door might often look like a tip but I do enjoy every bit of it. I enjoy sorting through it all and knowing it goes to people in need. Some people may drop of stuff that probably should go in the bin but majority are good donations. Whenever Care for the Coast does a call out on their Facebook page for specific things or asking for help, there are always plenty of people willing to give and help. The thing I have enjoyed the most is the Mums and friendships I have made. The Mums (and Dads) who run Care for the Coast are all volunteers and they are selfless, big hearted, witty, fun and even quirky but quirky in a good way. It is so much more than just collecting and referring, it is about community and helping to build people up.  I am in continual awe of Gina who set up Care for the Coast and Runs it. She works tirelessly and also has three autistic boys. She is amazing! .Wrapping didn’t finish on the night I wrapped, Gina has continued wrapping, sorting and getting all the pressies picked up or drop off for days afterwards.

Saturday night was my first time as part of the annual Care for the Coast Christmas Drive wrapping night. Seven volunteers worked until late at night wrapping all the presents. Well done everyone involved in the organising the Christmas drive, collecting, wrapping and distributing. Actually well done for everything you do all year.  I had a great night with lots of laughs, music and of course can’t forget the alcohol.