My Mum is brilliant artist. I have never been as good at art as she is. I’ve always tended to write more, however I don’t mind drawing occasionally. I discovered pastels and I quite enjoy doing pastel drawings. This is a heart pastel drawing I did last year.
I think we worry way to much what others think. Now this coming from me is like the pot calling the kettle black. Through out my life I was probably the queen of worrying too much about what others thought but I got tired of it because I wasn’t enjoying life as much as I could have been or really going for my dreams. I was holding back way too much and I realised that I was worrying about what others though because I needed reassurance. I wasn’t able to find that reassurance with in myself. I was constantly doubting and criticising myself. There fore I was seeking approval outside of myself. I mentioned in my previous blogs that we already have all the love, all the power and all strength with in. We can’t find it elsewhere, we create happiness within. I needed to find these things with in and only when I began to find them with in myself was I able to not worry so much about what other people thought.
I realised I just had to be myself, follow my heart and do the things I love. No more holding back and no more bringing myself down. Nothing and no one else was bringing me down, they didn’t have to, I was doing a good enough job of that myself. Many times I have said writing is my passion. Yet it brought so much inner conflict because I so much wanted to write, yet I held back out of fear. Fear that my writing wasn’t good enough, fear that I would say the wrong thing and upset some one. A part of me felt I had so much to share, yet another part just wanted to hide under rock.
I had to push past my insecurities and go for it any way. Writing is not only my passion but my purpose for writing out weighed anything that was holding me back. A big part of wanting to write is share my story and I hope to encourage, empower and inspire people, especially women who have gone through similar things. No matter what you are going through there is always some one out there experiencing or who has experienced the same. We aren’t alone and no matter how hard things get, we can rise above them. I’m very passionate about shining a light on mental health, domestic violence and sexual assault. I want to shine a light because I’ve experienced these things and I want to help others who have experienced these things. I think raising awareness is important but also education. I think society has made progress with awareness but there is still a lot of misconceptions out there and sadly these type of things are far to common. Ideally it would never happen but that’s a bit unrealistic to expect. I think domestic violence and sexual assault statistics can be greatly improved. I believe as a society, as friends, family, co workers we can better understand these things and support each other. These are my reasons for wanting to write, far out weigh any discomfort I may have.
Helping people to rise up again and sharing our stories makes me feel I have purpose in my life. I feel I’m doing something worthwhile and contributing my little bit to society. It might not be a lot, but I’m still doing my bit and it happens to be with something I love. What ever makes your heart sing, do more of that. If you want to find your purpose in your life, then follow the things you are passionate about., they will lead you to your purpose. No matter what you do, some one is not going to like it. We can’t please every one, so we may as well do what makes us happy. As much as I want to share my story, connect with others, yet also try to be respectful, thoughtful and tactful when including others in my writing, there will always be some one who takes it the wrong way. There will always be some one who doesn’t like it or judges and that’s fair enough. every one is entitled to their own opinion. At the end of the day I have to follow my heart and be true to myself. It is impossible to please everyone. No matter what it is that you are doing, if you love what you are doing, then I encourage you to go for it.